30 Keys to a Long and Satisfying Marriage

My husband and I just celebrated our 41st wedding anniversary. It seems as though the years have flown by and each year has added a deeper dimension to our relationship. So I thought I would share some of the keys (best practices and principles) for a successful marriage. These keys work for any relationship and I plan to expand on some of them in future posts. I don't claim that this is an exhaustive list by any means, but there are principles and ideas that will provide you with wisdom in any relationship. More wisdom keys can be found in the Bible. Anyone who studies it diligently will find much more than I can possibly share here.

And it's important to say that even though we know these keys and principles, we don't necessarily always follow them. We're still a work in progress just like everyone else. I hope that encourages you as you read through these.

So here is our list:

30 Keys to a Long and Satisfying Marriage

1. Put God first – worship Him together
2. Take time every day for the 6 minute prayer* 
3. Be quick to ask forgiveness
4. Be quick to forgive (seventy times seven)
5. Put the other’s interests above your own
6. Be a servant spouse
7. Be available
8. Do not use sex as a weapon against your partner
9. Spend time together – enjoying shared interests
10. Have fun together!
11. Desire the best for your partner even at your own expense
12. Cultivate gratefulness toward your spouse (not taking them for granted)
13. Let your spouse have the last word (let him/her think he/she’s right even when he/she isn’t)
14. Don’t embarrass him/her in public or in front of your children
15. Laugh with him/her, not at him/her
16. Thank God for how He has used your spouse in your life
17. Avoid the words, “always” and “never”
18. Keep each others secrets
19. Don’t keep secrets from each other
20. Understand the difference between relational and topical communication*
21. Do unto your spouse as you would have them do unto you (even if they don’t do the same)
22. Make him/her feel important
23. Be a good listener
24. Swallow your pride and be the first one to say you’re sorry
25. Edify him/her in front of everyone
26. Make him/her believe they can do anything
27. Trust God to change both you and your spouse because you can’t
28. Be your spouse’s best cheerleader and supporter
29. Take your marriage vows seriously - a covenant is serious
30. Make sure that divorce is not part of your thinking or your vocabulary

In this day and age when anything goes and most people go by what "feels good" to them, it's more important than ever to base our actions and decisions on solid principles that have stood the test of time. It's my hope that as you read through these, you will realize that without the help of a personal God and Savior to help you, you will fail. But He is alive and well and able to meet you wherever you are and to help you no matter what your current circumstances may be.

My prayer is that you will experience a lifetime of loving that is more satisfying than you could ever imagine. Don't forget to add your comments. I welcome any suggestions, comments or questions.

Sharon Reece

214 701-8298

P.S. For books that can help you with your relationship, check out the Family Foundations bookstore.

P.P.S. If you would like to work with me on a project I'm doing that will help any type of business, check out this link.

*I'll explain the 6 minute prayer and the difference between topical and relational communication in future posts.